Mean Tweets—Oscars Edition
毒舌推文--奧斯卡篇
"I feel like if you went to lunch with Natalie Portman, she would only order a hot tea with lemon and maybe some toast. Definitely not an entree, though."
「我覺得如果你跟娜塔莉.波曼去吃飯的話,她會只點一杯加檸檬的熱茶,可能還有一些烤麵包吧。不過絕對不會是點主餐。」
You are wrong.
你錯了。
"Oh, look at me...I'm Ryan Gosling. I have perfect bone structure and kind eyes. Go **** yourself, Ryan Gosling."
「噢,看看我...我是萊恩‧葛斯林。我有超完美的臉型和無害的雙眼。去死吧,萊恩‧葛斯林。」
"Samuel L. Jackson has resting fart face."
「山謬‧傑克森長了一張結屎面。」
Yes, I do.
嗯,我是有。
"I'm going to white balance my TV on Jessica Chastain's chest."
「我要在潔西卡‧雀絲坦的胸膛上調我電視的白平衡。」
I don't even know what that means...
我甚至不懂那是什麼意思...
"Are we all just ignoring the fact that Eddie Redmayne and Felicity Jones have the same face?"
「我們大家是要就這樣忽略艾迪‧瑞德曼和費莉絲蒂‧瓊斯的臉一模一樣這件事嗎?」
"Dear Eddie Redmayne, I hate your stinking guts. You make me vomit. You're the scum between my toes. Love, Zhenya, xoxo."
「親愛的艾迪‧瑞德曼,我超級討厭你這個人。你讓我反胃。你是我腳指縫間的渣渣。愛你的蘭亞,抱抱親親。」
"Tanner raised his arms and my dad looks at his armpit hair and says, 'You look like you have Whoopi Goldberg in a headlock.'"
「泰納舉起他的手臂,我老爸看著他的腋毛然後說:『你看起來像是使出頭部固定那招壓制住琥碧‧戈柏。』」
Really? That's it?
有沒有搞錯?就這樣?
"Lin-Manuel Miranda looks like he's getting a 1996 NBC sitcom with his haircut."
「林-曼努爾‧米蘭達那頭髮型看起來就像 1996 年國家廣播公司的情境喜劇。」
"Casey Affleck is the real-life version of Billy Bob Thorton's character in Sling Blade."
「凱西‧艾佛列克是比利‧鮑伯‧松頓在《彈簧刀》裡的角色的真人版。」
"Emma Stone looks like a crack whore in every role she plays."
「艾瑪‧史東演每個角色看起來都像吸毒的婊子。」
Great...
好極了...
"Miles Teller has the face of a guy who would request Gangnam Style at a wedding, where he doesn't know either the bride or groom."
「麥爾斯‧泰勒那張臉看起來就像會在婚禮上要求跳江南 Style 的人,可是他根本不認識新娘或新郎。」
Fair enough.
好喔。
"Now is probably a good time to remind everyone about this dog that looks like Tilda Swinton."
「現在或許是讓大家想起這隻長得像蒂坦‧絲雲頓的小狗的好時機。」
"I think Jeff Bridges wears pants a lot less than we all think he does."
「我想傑夫‧布里吉穿著褲子的時候可能比我們大家以為的少很多。」
Well, that's actually true.
嗯,那其實是真的。
"Robert De Niro is too old to make gangsta movies still. Dude needs to start playing grandfather roles or something."
「勞伯‧狄尼洛老到不能繼續演黑幫電影了。他老兄得開始演些阿公角色還是什麼的。」
Yeah, I am playing grandfather roles. And pretty soon I'll be playing great-grandfather roles. F*** you!
是啊,我是在演阿公角色。而且很快我就會演祖公角色了。去你的!
Mean Tweets—Oscars Edition
毒舌推文--奧斯卡篇
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你很愛點按鈕和訂閱東西嗎?那麼點下按鈕來訂閱我的頻道,你就能終於得到快樂。