Red decorations all over the panels
紅色裝飾牆上貼滿滿
Pineapples tarts and snacks all on the table
鳳梨酥零食桌上放滿滿
Words I can't read, I'm so bad at Chinese
都看不懂,我中文超爛
This new year I'm here for just one thing
回家過年只有一個目的
Meet up with cousins and aunties I don't know
卻和一群不認識的阿姨表哥碰面
Steal all the salmon from yusheng and act blur
裝無辜偷偷把魚生裡的鮭魚都吃完
Mothers keep comparing PSLEs
媽媽們愛比較誰的小六離校成績好看
This new year I'm here for just one thing
回家過年只有一個目的
You want this? Forget it
妳要這個?想都別想
Your grades are like garbage
妳成績那麼爛
Xiao Ming scored higher
小明都考比妳好
You don't deserve it
妳不配拿
And look at your clothes
妳看看妳的衣服
Not red, so basic
又不紅,又陽春
Ah Ma, Gong xi fa cai!
阿嬤,恭喜發財!
I know you don't mean it
妳根本沒有認真講
No boyfriend? Don't get it
沒男朋友?不要交啊
You got fat? Forget it
變胖了?算了吧
Your orange is spoilt
妳橘子都爛掉了
I see it, I hate it
我一看到就討厭
"Xin nian kuai le?"
「新年快樂?」
You visit once a year!
妳一年才回家一次
Then stay on your phone pretending we are not here?
結果還一直滑手機把我們當空氣?
Damn, why do Asian moms gotta be so vicious?
可惡,亞洲媽媽怎麼都這麼愛生氣?
I even memorized my Chinese well wishes
我都背好了中文祝賀詞
"Luan qi ba zao"
「亂七八糟」
"Ni ai pai ma pi"
「妳愛拍馬屁」
Oh, sh*t, why does she look so unhappy?
喔,糟糕,她怎麼看起來這麼不爽啊?
Kids these days don't know a thing about customs
現在小孩一點都不瞭解習俗文化
Some even don't know the name of their cousins
連他們的表兄弟都不知道叫啥
Just one day for everyone to be happy
過年只是要讓大家開心
You really can't please the whole family
沒辦法取悅每個人的心
No boyfriend?
沒男朋友?
Too skinny
太瘦了啦
Low income?
賺很少?
Not married
沒結婚
She just 11, got boyfriend already?
她才 11 歲就有男朋友了?
What school you go to?
妳念哪間學校?
Can tutor my family?
可以來我們家家教嗎?
My daughter must score better than you do eventually
我女兒以後成績一定比妳高
Can love it, can hate it
喜歡也好,討厭也好
Still have to go through it
經歷這些都是必要
The questions and sass
被問問題和頂嘴
Can't give it a pass
都是必經之路
At the end of the day, a family's a family
但是家人終究是家人
So this Chinese New Year just have fun and be merry
所以大家就開開心心過年吧