Look, a bird!
你看,一隻鳥耶!
Inside?
在家裡?
Uh-huh. So weird. I don't know where it went.
嗯哼。真奇怪。不知道牠跑哪去了。
Eight Things Every Parent Secretly Does
八件每個爸媽在背後偷偷做的事
(Use Your Kids as an Excuse) He's feeling really under the weather. Yeah. Oh! God! I mean, he just vomited a little. I'm so sorry, but we're not gonna be able to make it tonight.
(用小孩當藉口) 我兒子他真的很不舒服。對啊。噢!天啊!我是說,他剛剛稍微吐了。我很抱歉,不過我們今晚沒辦法到了。
(Use Hide and Seek Time Wisely) Okay, I'll count 2,000; you go hide.
(聰明利用躲貓貓時間) 好,我數到 2,000;你去躲起來。
Sure.
好。
Okay! One, two, three... Oh! Damn! Twenty Pilates classes for 40 bucks? Groupon, you be crazy for this one.
好!1、2、3... 噢!夭壽!二十堂皮拉提斯只要四十美金?Groupon 你真的起肖了。
(Invent Your Own Laws) Can I have Lucky Charms for dinner?
(瞎掰出自己專屬的法律) 我晚餐可以吃棉花糖穀片嗎(註一)?
No. It's against the law.
不行。那樣是違法的。
Tommy's mom lets him have them.
湯米的媽媽都會讓他吃。
Tommy's mom is a criminal.
湯米的媽媽是個罪犯。
("Lose" a Toy)
(「弄丟」玩具)
I'm thirsty.
我好渴。
Why don't you go get some water, sweetie?
親愛的,那你怎麼不去喝點水呢?
Okay. Where'd my game go?
好吧。我的遊戲機呢?
I don't know. You must have lost it.
不知道。你肯定是弄丟了。
(Straight-Up Lie)
(明擺著的謊言)
Ooh, ice cream! Can we get some?
哇,冰淇淋!我們可以買嗎?
Oh, no, that song means they're all out of ice cream.
噢,不行喔,放那首歌就是他們的冰淇淋賣完了。
Oh! I thought they only played one song.
喔!我還以為他們只會放一首歌呢。
(Tell Abridged Fairy Tales) Cinderella was the most beautiful girl at the ball. Everyone talked about her and wondered who she was... And then Cinderella just decided to marry Pumpkin! The end.
(講刪減版的童話故事) 灰姑娘是舞會上最美麗的女孩。大家都在談論然後猜她是誰... 然後灰姑娘就決定嫁給南瓜了!結束。
You can marry pumpkins?
你可以嫁給南瓜?
In some states, yes. Good night!
在有些國家,對啊。晚安!
Okay...
好吧...
(Act Like a Kid)
(表現得像個小孩)
...43...47...
...43...47...
註一:Lucky Charms 是美國一穀片品牌,特色是裡面還有小塊棉花糖。
- 「身體不適」- Under The Weather
He's feeling really under the weather.
我兒子他真的很不舒服。